“Is it me or the city?”

Exploring why making friends in Tallinn feels so different from Lagos.

Whether you’re moving for work, traveling as a digital nomad, or simply exploring new corners of the world, one thing remains true: meaningful connections can transform any place into a home.

But how do you navigate the social landscape of a new city? How can you find your people, feel seen, and build relationships that matter? Let’s explore how to connect deeply in different environments, focusing on two contrasting cities: Lagos, Portugal, and Tallinn, Estonia.

Lagos, Portugal: Embrace the Warmth and Openness

If you’re craving a community that’s as warm and inviting as the sun-soaked beaches of the Algarve, Lagos is your spot. This vibrant coastal town is a magnet for digital nomads, adventurers, and locals alike. Here, people are eager to meet, share stories, and build connections. It’s a place where a simple coffee chat can turn into a lasting friendship, and where every interaction feels like a step closer to finding your tribe.

Tips for Connecting in Lagos:

  • Dive In Headfirst: In Lagos, opportunities to connect are everywhere. Whether it’s a local yoga class, a business networking event, or an art workshop, there’s always something happening. Say yes to invitations, join Facebook groups, or check out community groups for events.

  • Be Open and Approachable: The friendly vibe of Lagos means people are generally receptive to new connections. Smile, make eye contact, and don’t hesitate to strike up a conversation. Whether you’re at the market, a café, or a beach gathering, your openness will be met with warmth.

  • Enjoy the Small-Town Feel: Lagos’s charm lies in its close-knit community. It’s small enough that you’re likely to bump into the same faces repeatedly, allowing relationships to grow organically over time. Use this to your advantage and let familiarity turn into friendship.

Tallinn, Estonia: Discover the Beauty of Slow-Burning Connections

Tallinn, on the other hand, offers a more reserved, quiet atmosphere. It’s a city rich in history and culture, where people value depth and sincerity over casual acquaintances. At first glance, Tallinn might seem like a tough place to crack socially, but don’t be discouraged. The connections you make here might take longer to form, but they’re often deeper and more loyal.

Tips for Connecting in Tallinn:

  • Be Patient and Respect the Local Pace: In Tallinn, relationships are built on trust, which takes time. Don’t rush the process. Instead, embrace the slower pace and let connections develop naturally.

  • Engage in Shared Interests: Find activities or groups that align with your passions—whether it’s a book club, a hiking group, or a local dance class. Shared interests are a powerful way to bond with others, especially in a place where people value meaningful interactions.

  • Show Genuine Curiosity: Estonians appreciate authenticity and sincerity. Take the time to learn about the local culture, learn the language, ask questions, and show genuine interest in the people you meet. This kind of engagement can help bridge the initial reserve and open the door to deeper connections.

No Matter Where You Are: Be Yourself and Be Kind

At the heart of building connections is the simple act of being yourself. Whether you’re in Lagos, Tallinn, or anywhere else, authenticity and kindness will always be your best tools. Remember that it’s okay to feel lonely sometimes; it’s a natural part of the human experience, especially in new environments. But with patience, openness, and a little effort, you can turn those moments of solitude into opportunities for connection.

Your Journey to Connection: What to Take Away

Wherever you go, know that you have the power to create your own community. With a little patience, a touch of bravery, and a lot of heart, you can turn any city into a place where you feel seen, understood, and connected.

If you need some help. feel free to reach out!

Yours, Silja

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